LONELINESS IN TODAY'S LIFE

LONELINESS: A SOCIAL DISEASE TODAY

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Loneliness is a very contemporary issue today. No matter how developed and modern we are, the need of connecting to people is always there. We human beings have feelings which we need to share with people and for that, we need to connect with them.

Feeling lonely is a lack of mental and emotional connection with people. It is a feeling of left out and not 'in tune' with people around us. It depends on the quality of the relationship we are having with a person. Loneliness doesn't depend on isolation.

'Being lonely' and 'living alone' are two totally different things. When a person chooses to stay alone that means he is not comfortable with social exposure. But when there are people around still we hesitate to share our feelings with them, cannot shout at them when we are angry......always bound to maintain an image in front of them..........that is the feeling of being lonely.

WHY ARE WE SO ALONE TODAY :

1. Firstly and very simply if you cannot figure out what to do in your free time it will lead you towards the feeling of being alone.

2. You're depending on others' opinions about you than yourself and trying to shape yourself according to their choice which makes you think that no one understands you. 

3. You have lost faith in yourself because of some earlier happenings. You are afraid that your own decision on something could lead you to disaster and that's why you depend on others to decide things on your behalf. Maybe your parents only do that but it gradually finishes one's self-confidence and pushes him toward insecurities.

4. Shyness can be a cause of being lonely. You fail to express your opinion, fail to communicate with people properly because of shyness.

5. Your feeling of not being worthy of anything good can make you feel lonely. This feeling can be triggered by many things. Maybe in spite of working hard, you fail to achieve something which leads you to self worthlessness.  

6. You are afraid that everyone will leave you alone if you prioritize your opinion and yourself. So you are always pretending to be someone else, always agreeing on what others say. After a certain time, this extreme concern of not exposing yourself publicly will make you feel lost and not existing anywhere.

7. Due to some past incidents you have convinced yourself that no one will ever understand you. And you have made up your own world of melancholy inside your head and living in that.

8. If any trust issue related to past or trauma controls your every activity in life, you will not be able to comfortable with people around you. Your instinct won't let you trust anyone. Gradually you will be put in a nutshell of loneliness.

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9. We don't like to be judged but we do judge people more or less. If you are too judgmental there will be no one left on your friend list except you.

10. Sometimes a fear of being left out prevent us from accepting people. And we decide to stay alone.

11. During any kind of stress, anxiety, depression, the feeling of being lonely hurts the most and it's worst when you have people around but they are not ready to understand or maybe you are not comfortable to share your heart with them.

12. Too much arrogance makes you choosy about people which again leads to loneliness.

13. Apart from all these another vital reason is any near and dear one's death. It scatters us from inside.

14. There is another kind of situation of being alone in which most senior citizens are in. Sadly there are very few people who get to live with the next generation. The worst is when they are sent to old age homes by their own son and daughters.  Once they were the soul of a family and now hardly anyone cares about them. Grown-up kids do their duty by sending money, some don't even bother about that. All they have are memories and endless loneliness.

SOME POSSIBLE REMEDIES :

Loneliness is actually a state of mind being empty. Try to keep yourself busy and scheduled to maintain your peace of mind. If you are busy, you won't be getting time to think about these things rather you would be trying to get time for yourself.

You need to accept the situation that you are alone. When we suffer from loneliness we focus on the part "everybody is having fun....why I am the lonely one?"

But if we accept our loneliness in the first place then we can try to get out of it instead of drooling over it. 

We can sometimes control our habit of being judgmental and accept people with their pros and cons. 

Stop thinking that they should come to you. Maybe they are also waiting for you to come.....all you need is just to take the first step towards them. It's okay to say 'Hi' first.

This loneliness can turn into utter depression if you start to live in it. Rather accept it....move forward and explore yourself. Instead of worrying about what you don't have start utilizing what you already have. Maybe you can find a new version of yourself.

We live in big cities today, having hundreds of people around us still, we are the loneliest. Nobody cares if they haven't seen a person for a few days. Your pain, agony everything just fades away in the chaos of super-fast, busy life. No one's plan gets stuck if you deny joining. So, it's better to find some way out than complaining about it. 

Also Read :

6 SHADES OF MOOD 

TANTRUMS OF MOOD

SELF CARING: LIVING A BETTER VERSION OF LIFE

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